THE LAB

> one person. one bench. an unreasonable number of enclosures.

AUDIO FREAKS started because I kept building circuits that didn't work right and liking them more than the ones that did. A misbiased transistor, a delay chip clocked too fast, a divider that can't track a chord — those are the sounds I actually reach for.

At some point I noticed I was talking about the pedals like they were people. “He splutters.” “She won't hold still.” So I started drawing them that way, and the knob layout turned out to already be a face. Now every product here is one character with a name, a personality, and a specific way of ruining your signal.

Everything on this site is made by me: the circuits, the artwork, the docs, this website. Pedals are built to order and tested on an actual amp before they go in the box. Plug-ins are written in C++ and I fix bugs myself. When you email support, that's me too.

I sell four things — finished pedals, plug-ins, sample packs, and the plans to build the circuits yourself. The plans are priced low on purpose. If you can build it yourself, you should.

BENCH_INVENTORY.TXT
  • > 1x soldering iron, tip permanently ruined
  • > 1x drill press that walks across the bench
  • > 1x SM57 with dented grille
  • > 1x oscilloscope from 1987
  • > 4x cats, non-load-bearing

THE WHOLE FAMILY

QUESTIONS

Is this a real shop or a bit?

Real. The pedals are real, the plug-ins run in your DAW, and the plans are documents you can build from. The faces are the bit, and also not a bit.

Why does everything have a face?

Because a knob layout is already a face and pretending otherwise is cowardice. Two knobs, a switch, an LED — that's eyes, a mouth, and a pupil. We just finished the drawing.

How long does a pedal take?

Three to five days if the enclosure is already drilled, up to two weeks if it isn't. You'll get a photo of your specific freak before it ships.

Can I get a repair?

Yes, forever, on anything with our name on it. Send it back. If you built it from our plans we'll still help you find the cold joint.

Do I need to know electronics for the build plans?

You need to be able to solder. You do not need to understand the circuit — the docs explain what each stage does and why, so you finish the build knowing more than you started with.

What about licensing for the sample packs?

Royalty-free, use them in anything commercial or not, no clearance, no split. Just don't repackage the raw WAVs and sell them as your own pack.